R o m a n
I am constantly being asked how to achieve more confidence in yourself, body, and life in general. Here are some things that have really helped me:
- Decide right now that you are beautiful, confident, and have the world by the tail. It sounds simple, but that’s all there is to it. Start saying things that you love about yourself. It doesn’t have to be all aesthetic, but the whole package. Maybe you love your laugh, the way you can brighten someone’s day, your fantastic cupcake baking ability, a freckle on your nose, it could be anything. Decide that you are beautiful and be confident about it. Never let anyone tell you differently.
- Pursue your passions. Who has time to pick themselves apart when there is so much to do in life? Learn a language, meet new friends, go out for coffee, watch your favorite films, go dancing, go out into nature and appreciate all the beauty. Set goals and chase them :) There are so many more worthwhile ways to spend your life, go see everything and experience things and never let how you look hold you back.
- Remember that ‘beauty’ is a relative concept. There is no one image of beautiful, regardless of what society tries to tell you. In my opinion people are the most beautiful for all of the things that they are, rather than what they look like. People who are kind, stand up for what they believe in, funny, clever, trustworthy, brave, determined…those are the sort of people I want to be around, not someone who is simply ‘pretty’ or ‘handsome.’ Your ‘flaw’s and ‘quirks’ make you who you are, embrace them and start living.
- Never associate with anyone who makes you feel badly about yourself. If someone doesn’t like you for exactly who you are, they can fuck off. Don’t chase people who don’t deserve to be in your life and don’t spend your life trying to please people. Do your thing, be you, and the right people are going to find you and be there. Associate with people who lift you higher, people who are doing things with their lives and have passions and goals too.
- Celebrate every little thing about yourself. I don’t care if you are the best Pokemon player in existence (which is quite a massive accomplishment, mind you), OWN IT. Never let anyone hold you back from pursuing your dreams or tell you that they aren’t important enough. Everything you do is important.
- Be kind to others. How you treat others impacts your view of yourself. Be the person that you would want to associate with. Smile at strangers, make new friends, volunteer for causes and people in need. Call your grandparents and say hello. Tell your mom you love her just because. Bring your best friend an ice cream cone if she’s had a bad day. Be a good person. That being said, never, ever let anyone walk all over you. Being a nice person doesn’t mean that you allow yourself to be taken advantage of. Stick up for yourself and those in need.
- Decide that you are badass, warrior goddess. Seriously. You aren’t a damsel in distress, you don’t need anyone to save you. You are ready to take on whatever the world throws at you and laugh. You’re going to experience failure, all great people do. Lack of experience with failure is fatal. You are going to try your hardest and fail, but you’ll learn. You’re also going to get right back up, dust yourself off, and say bring it on again.
A 1982 metro bus converted into a three bedroom traveling home in Brighton.
|—||Helen Mirren (via imnotchaste)|
1. Know that you are still blooming, and this is okay.
2. Write handwritten love notes to the parts of yourself you hate.
3. Find the comfort in holding your own hand.
4. Remember, even clouds cry sometimes.
5. Date yourself. Get to know yourself again.
6. Learn how to be alone without feeling lonely.
7. Do something that scares you every day, no matter how small. Watch your life change.
8. Stop wishing for a vacation and make your life into something you don’t wish to escape from.
9. Recognize that the best artists color outside the lines. You have the same freedom in your life. Break conventions.
10. Go to the florist on the corner and buy yourself some flowers. Spoil yourself. You deserve it.
11. Throw out your premeditated list of qualities for your perfect mate. That special person is not a recipe or equation. Humans are more than that.
12. Share your testimony. Our story is meant to be heard. Find your voice.
13. Wish to be more like rain than snow. Snow is frigid and hardens. Rain is vulnerable and soft.
14. Look at your veins. They are roots, and your limbs are branches. Your body is a strong tree. Don’t you dare cut it down.
15. Strive to have the humility as the sun. It shines brilliantly every day without needing anyone to notice.
16. Flip through old photos and reminisce about the past, but do not live there. Nothing new happens there.
17. Dust off the fingerprints of any past lover left on your skin. You belong only to yourself.
18. Become the person you’d like to fall in love with.
19. Loving yourself again will be like putting on eyeglasses. The blur will fade and you will see yourself for what you truly are: beautiful.